It took me a long time to even think or process the things that I have been through, my story, my life. But now as I sit in front of this computer and write the words that you are reading to a page, I am owning every aspect. I never thought that I would be able to share the pain, the devastation or the feelings I have of being completely lost broken and defeated. But here I am, 10 years later, opening up the wounds to share a message of hope, love and light for anyone, that is feeling lost or like there isn't anything left. If I can help someone not have to the feel the pain that I felt with this blog. If I can help one person realize they are worth so much more than what they believe in this exact moment, if I can send a message of hope to the single mom, or dad, who is second guessing themselves about staying away from the toxic situation their ex's bring, or even to leave the vial situation, then every single letter, word, reminder and tear that has been shed for this is worth it.
This is where it all changed.
"It's just another live video, I can totally handle that" I was participating in a 14 day challenge for a company that I promote for. This challenge consisted of me doing a live video a day for 14 days. I didn't think much of it as I have done lives quite a bit. However the one I did this day changed everything. Usually I jumped on Facebook Live and did a silly video about "How to tell the Weather" which consisted of using cows, or "5 things to eat before bed to lose weight", but for some reason, I decided to wait until later in the evening to do my live. I had just finished a photo shoot for Domestic Violence and ended up leaving the shoot with a purple hand print on my face. Driving home, I realized that I forgot to do my live. I thought "well i have this hand print on my face" and I owned it! I pulled over, pulled Facebook up on my phone and Hit record! For the first time, I shared some of my story. I spoke of Domestic Violence, my pain, how to help those that are going through the same thing and I was open! I was healing, right there, in front of everyone on Facebook Live!!
“I had my purple hand print moment.”
After finishing my video, I had to sit in the parking lot and reflect on what I just did. I never thought that I would ever share my story. For so long I was shamed for what I had been through. I learned that the easiest thing was to bottle it up, hide it away and deal with the PTSD in a silent way that was all alone. NOT ANY MORE!! I had so much love and positive support for the fact that I spoke up about it. I knew that DV was something that happened but I didn't realize how many people actually go through it and do not speak about it. After seeing the out pour of love and "thank you for sharing" I realized that Owning my story, and sharing it will help others do the same. This was what I have been looking for!! A way to heal and a way to help others. I continued to do my daily challenge but the content changed. I started to speak on things that helped me heal, that would help others, that could truly make a difference. Katie's Crazy Corner was born. Now I am here to share my story, Own it in every way possible and provide hope for those that have lost it. This is my Story. Through this blog I will share the things that have helped me, the way that I healed, found self love and learned that I am not what I was made to believe I am.
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